Gentlemen, do not fret, I'm done with you - in the sense of blogging about your online dating etiquette. Today, we are going to slap the women in the face with a chair with online dating etiquette.
Yes, ladies - You, er...us. We make the same amount, if not more, mistakes as men when it comes to online dating etiquette. Like I said in my last blog, "Take off your imaginary tiara." No one made you a princess and too special to put you fingertips to a keyboard to respond or even initiate.
I am someone with minimal experience in online dating, as said in my recent entry, but I know in my two weeks of experience I made mistakes. I didn't respond to 98% of the guys that found the brief bit of courage and confidence to send a message. That's tough stuff, setting yourself up for failure. That's how I feel about it - expect rejection first, acceptance second.
Ladies:
Refrain from ranting.
Don't start off annoying. When we rant and complain, we start sounding like a car engine that won't crank. Don't rant in text either. This gives the guy the sound a car engine not cranking, ranting about past relationships, what you don't want, and why he never cooked dinner. Men don't want to read you going on and on about how men are pigs and how there are no decent men in the world. This is the quickest way to earn the title "Psycho Man Hater." An online dating situation is the least appropriate place for this type of behavior. It's up there with on the first date, second date, third date, a wedding or a funeral.
Stalking doesn't do it.
So you've been in an online relationship for about a month now (why you haven't met yet is beyond me), and you think it's headed to the next level. Wait a minute, your online beau stops cold. What do you do? Pelt him with emails and IMs until he answers? Beg him to get back to you? Check the site every five minutes to see if he's online? Don't answer with any of those options. The answer is none of those, you crazy lady. This is a common occurrence, so don't be so surprised. What you should be is diplomatic about it. Instead of cyber-stalking, send a quick email. "Hey, this is crazy bat lady, just wondering if everything is OK?" If you don't hear back from him, you probably won't. Moving on.
Refrain from using profanity.
I'm a ginger, and I even abide by this rule in 99% of my life. Maybe 89%. When men use profanity, it can be taken as a lack of respect. When women use profanity, it makes you look cheap. Need I say more?
Stringing someone along is poor taste.
Don't tie up someone's time, energy and emotions if you don't see any potential. Proper etiquette goes a little something like this: "Bill, I'm sorry but I don't see us as a potential match. Best of luck. I have to go now." Chances are, you won't hear from him again. If you do, don't prolong this and exchange emails with him. Poor Bill.
Lying about you age, weight and height.
Not only is this poor etiquette, but it gives online dating a bad name. The proper thing to do is be honest, even if you weren't so upfront on your profile. Remember, you can only avoid a meeting for so long. Eventually, you'll meet and he'll find out what you really look like anyway. Luring him in with lies after he has invested interest, time and emotion is in poor taste. Have some decency and be honest. Women tend to have a habitual lying problem.
Stop talking.
We do it. We talk. It's the whole being a female thing. Once we get going, we are going and the finish line is when the guy yawns and declares it's time to leave. We tend to talk about ourselves. We tend to complain. How about you get to know him. You already know yourself. Also, get off of your phone. Put the thing on silent. Better yet, don't even have it on you. Disconnect yourself for a while. He doesn't care what's going on with your Facebook. Nor does he care about you pretending to text someone.
Don't overdo it.
This applies to offline dating. When you go a on first date, for the love of cake, do not cake it on. I'm referring to makeup, your best clothes, high heels, jewelry and your personality. Be yourself. Don't try to match your personality to with his. I am very animated and I prefer the very laid back. If I tried to be laid back, he'd be bored. Be yourself. I will say it time and time again. If you're not yourself upfront, what will you be seven months from now?
Ladies, you don't want to be that girl. That girl that he tells his friends that he would never see again. That girl that talks too much. That girl that is too shy. That girl who smelled terrible (take a shower). The best way to be memorable is to be yourself. If he doesn't like that, move on. Someone will.
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